Well, here I am, finally working on a post from my new netbook! It has been a difficult, frustrating couple of months for me, with constant setbacks & disappointments. None of you even have the time to read about all the glitches and dare I say, even opposition in the spirit to my attempts to improve my Internet situation.
Yet, here I am…
The Scriptures speak of God giving the treasures of darkness (Isaiah 45, v.3). ( I’ve always loved this verse! as well as the one in Exodus 20, speaking of the “thick darkness where God was.” I find such concepts comforting, encouraging. I love how, with the Lord, things can be inside out & upside down but still, it’s Him at work. Fear not.) The Lord, through the prophet Isaiah, also declares that He will break in pieces the gates of brass, and do some serious damage to the bars of iron! (I’m paraphrasing a bit on the last one!)
Can I tell you how very much the above phrases described me & my banging-my-head-against-a-wall recent struggle with cyber-space techno wizardry. Joking & exaggeration aside, I don’t know if I’ve EVER been so obstructed in anything I’ve ever tried to do. I had made a decision that if I could not get faster Internet, I would have to simply cease & desist from online activity. My blog would be shut-down for a year or two, until I’d saved enough money for a really good computer system. I would find a more ‘normal’ full-time job…(okay, really, I thought I could actually do this!) I meant business. Therefore, with each successive disappointment came increasing despair.
I’ve learned a few things.
Though I’m sure I will not, and have not always, follow(ed) my own advice, this time I did – LISTEN to what God is saying to you. When my netbook arrived, my first almost crushing blow fell. A critical part didn’t fit. NO one seemed to know anything! Without finding an answer to this dilemma, I was hung out to dry, and there wasn’t a chance of reaching my goal. Weird thing, from the gitgo, I had a very clear witness in my heart not to return the netbook. A calm, steady witness. I knew it was God, and I knew what I heard.
Like I said, you don’t have the time for me to go into a laundry list of the problems & pitfalls that befell me…suffice it to say…they were there! But I made the decision not to send the computer back, regardless of the outcome. Any outcome. And if it was a waste of a few hundred dollars…so be it. There are things more important than money, and besides, with the Lord, what’s a few C notes? He can more than cover me for that! (And I must tell you that I am never this relaxed about what, to me, is kind of alot of money, so…this alone validates the whole ‘witness of God’ thing.)
An astonishing outcome,looking back, is that the solution to another difficuty, which would’ve been a worst case scenario, and seemed unsolvable, was in place all along, right IN the computer. The answer was always there. Interesting…hey, am I stretching it if I say, as Jacob did, “Surely the Lord is in this place: and I knew it not.” (Genesis 28:16) ?
I’m not sure if I’m going to share the rest…maybe one day, years from now, in my memoirs! Or maybe, it will remain between myself and the Lord, forevermore.